File No. 042

Buckle

Two Eyes, Three Legs, No Nonsense

"I keep my head level. That's the whole job."

Found: Under the drill press, refusing to be swept out · Filed 2007

Quirks

• Insists on being addressed before the machinery is turned on
• Will not stand on a floor he hasn't personally inspected
• Sleeps with one leg forward, ready to leave. Never does.

Parts

• Chrome seatbelt buckle housing, head
• Hex nut and bolt, eyes
• Brass valve body, torso
• Old fountain pen nibs, arms
• Steel tie-rod linkages, legs
• L-brackets, feet

Origin

Buckle was found braced against the base of the drill press, in the exact position of someone who had been holding it up for years. The drill press did not, technically, need holding up. Nobody told him.

He has stood in that same tripod stance ever since. When we move him, he walks back within a week.